“Sir, one of my friends will receive you at the airport and I will be there the next day” my friend, the medical representative sponsoring my conference, said. With a lot of effort, I prepared a paper in order to present it in the said conference. No sooner had I disembarked from the aircraft than I started thinking “What if no one comes to pick me up? “However, I was delighted to see one of the people at arrivals waiting with a cardboard bearing my name.
“Welcome sir “ he said as he opened the door of the cab. I stepped into the air-conditioned cab in a hassle-free manner, without the usual stress of bargaining over the price with the taxi driver.
I sat in the corner of the cab diagonally opposite the driver’s seat. I tried to remain calm. I pulled out a scientific article and started looking at it. Well, my eyes were on the article but my mind was somewhere else. I unwillingly maintained my mood and my silence (perfect bureaucratic style) until I entered the premises and saw the beautiful lawns of the hotel. It was extremely gracious, and the room was magnificent too – much higher than what I was accustomed to. “I’m afraid I don’t have membership of your health club.
What is the procedure if I wish to use it?” I asked the receptionist when I called only to ensure that the wonderful health club was included in the package. “Sir, you need not be a member. Please feel free to use it when you wish,” the receptionist replied. I was thrilled and asked him to book a slot for me at 8 pm as if it had been my routine activity….
After dinner I fell asleep, but I could not sleep properly. I woke up 3 or 4 times during the night as I was very much worried about my presentation which was to be delivered the next day. What if they ask me this? and what if they ask me that? , many questions like these raced through my mind all
night.
Finally, at 5 am I decided to get up and get ready even though my presentation was only at 2.30 pm. I again ironed my new suit. After 2 or 3 attempts I finally succeeded in making a beautiful knot in my special red tie which I had worn on the day of my marriage, and came down from my room.
There was a big mirror in the hotel lobby and I went close to see myself, remembered Amitab Bachan while approximating neck tie a little more. “Ibrahim looking smart! kahien nazar na lag jayaie” (God save you from evil eye) whispered my heart and I headed towards the conference venue. The time came and my name was announced ….and while walking to the podium my heart rate went up, and I could feel it racing.
I was still worried about questions! However, no sooner had I concentrated on the audience than my heart rate settled down.
A few delegates were in the front row, most of them yawning, and in the corner a few delegates were busy chatting, and believe me when I say that in the central rows, the beautiful chairs were seen shining emptily. After my presentation which was attended by only a few people, most of them asleep and having had no discussion at all afterwards, I was rather annoyed and disgusted.
I quickly removed my tie and attended some lectures. That evening I left for somesight-seeing. “Is this true for all conferences that attendance is more in malls than in lecture halls?” I asked one of my seniors. “It is usual“…he sarcastically laughed!
On the second day of the conference I attended mostly exhibition stalls and poster sessions. But at 12.30pm I was surprised to see lot of delegates pouring into the conference venue, Yes, they were there to attend the pre-lunch sessions, but only to partake of the delicious food minutes later. All of
them had registered to get the CME (Continuous Medical Education) hours needed in the process of their renewal of registration. They had come to collect their certificates.
Anyway, during lunch time, with the help of a friend I managed to have a photograph with a stalwart of Gastroenterology taken, as if I had been called to decide an important guideline in the conference.
One of the most fascinating things at the conference was the conference badge worn by organizers and I made a wish, yes, it was to organize one conference at least. It was when I was back at work with wonderful memories, of course.
Days later my friend, the medical representative called. “Sir, please take care to prescribe our products today.” Yes, it was my OPD clinic. I went on writing prescriptions for the medications I felt were indicated for his brand because after all he was the man behind that great conference. Initially I
was irritated by his calls, but later I realized that both of us (the medical representative and me) were dancing to the tune of the boss of the company sitting miles away from us. It was certainly not his fault. Sales were the main goal, of the company and he too had pressure from his boss.
Who sponsored my conference? I asked myself. It was soon very clear to me that it was not the company itself, but indirectly the patients!
Millions are spent on conferences every year by companies. At most of them, nothing new is discussed and taught. The sad thing is that the attendance at the presentations remains very poor. Looking other way round, we can learn much more and get better information through Telemedicine facilities or regular CME at a local level. Is this expenditure really worth it? I peeped into my heart further.
When “Deccan Airway” decided to cut down on food items etc. during their flights, the results were dramatic. Air travel became pocket-friendly for one and all. Their trend was followed by number of other airlines later. Why can’t drug companies divert the billions spent on conferences towards making drugs cheaper for patients? It would help a lot of people and no one would be trapped in the race for sales like me and my representative friend were.
Conferences should be sponsored by hospitals and not by drug companies. They are an important part of professional development.
Yes, CME hours should be obtained from Medscape like materials. Such CME hours are much more genuine than CME obtained from conferences.
However, friends, after few winters I too got a chance to become the organizing secretary of a conference. Yes, my wish to wear that yellow conference badge and once more the navy blue suit and the red tie came true! Well without elaborating my experience as organizing secretary, I just want to sum up as I am afraid the chapter will become too long.
To put it in a nutshell, if you intend to be organizing secretary of a conference in near future, be ready to abandon things at home for at least two months before and one month after the show. You will have to start cancelling appointments for your procedures and your clinics, unless you are lucky enough to have good number of faculty members, and they are ready to share your work. It is a Herculean task to arrange funding, and everyone will expect your budget to be huge, which is rarely the case. In order to ensure that all goes flawlessly, you require an extremely dedicated and hard-working team. If your team is slow and irresponsible then only God can save you.
One word of caution, however: please don’t involve students, interns or postgraduates in the process as it is a pure waste of their precious time. It is simply exploitation. They need to know the basics of medicine, and such experiences are irrelevant for their careers. If, on the day of the show, someone doesn’t get a proper bag or food in time your efforts are wasted as no one will think of crediting you for the excellence of the scientific material presented. Please be assured, I don’t intend to discourage you, but remember “no job is too big and no pup is too small.”
“Do not go where the path may lead,
go instead where there is no path and leave a trail.”
– Ralph Waldo Emerson
Excerpt from the Book Bumby Roads authored by Dr. Ibrahim Masoodi who graduated from Govt.Medical college Srinagar, Kashmir and completed his DM in Gastroenterology from PGI Chandigarh India . Apart from his work as a physician Dr Ibrahim has keen interest in literature. He can be mailed at ibrahimmasoodi@yahoo.co.in
